The First Rule for a Harmonious Family: Make Up Before Bedtime

In my family, there is one rule—our only rule: “Don’t bring sadness into your dreams.” This rule was established before my wife and I got married and has been followed ever since we started our family and welcomed our baby.
In any relationship, whether with family or friends, there will inevitably be disagreements. This is also true for couples in love. During our dating days, my wife and I would occasionally have our small disputes. At that time, she made a request: “No matter what arguments we have, please reconcile before bedtime. I don’t want to bring sadness into my dreams.”
As a smart husband, I understood the underlying message: “Regardless of who is right or wrong, if we argue, you need to make it up to me before we sleep!”
There were several times when we argued passionately, and I found it hard to swallow my pride. When bedtime came, I thought to myself, as a grown man, how could I not manage to get over a few bowls of rice? So, I apologized to my wife, and we made up as if nothing had happened.

Once, my son Yat-fu unknowingly did something wrong and I scolded him. He refused to talk to me all day. At first, he hid in his room or behind his mother. But every time he passed by me, he would sneak a glance before retreating to a place where I couldn’t see him.
Eventually, it was time for bed.
Usually, my children, whether it was Yat-fu or his sister No-yi, would excitedly run over to kiss my wife and me, loudly saying, “Sweet dreams!” or “Love you!” However, that night, Yat-fu stubbornly refused to come over and say goodnight. He clung to the helper, constantly shouting that he wanted to go to bed.
So, I walked over to him and asked, “Are you angry with Daddy?”
Yat-fu nodded.
“Because Daddy scolded you today?”
He nodded again, his eyes turning red.
“Can we make up?”
He shook his head.
“What if Daddy apologizes?”
Finally, Yat-fu broke down and cried in my arms, releasing all the grievances he had built up throughout the day.
I’m sure everyone understands that arguments are uncomfortable for both sides. According to Yat-fu, when he gets angry, it feels like a thousand bugs are crawling and biting inside him. So, who would want to take a thousand bugs into their dreams?
In truth, Yat-fu longed for reconciliation; he just didn’t know how to express his feelings due to pride.
I told Yat-fu, “Daddy and Mommy have an agreement: no matter what disagreements we have, we must reconcile before bedtime!”
After all, we shouldn’t let our loved ones go to sleep with tears in their eyes, should we?